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Is it "uncool" to WANT to be a stay-at-home mom?

Answers:1   |   LastAnswerAt:2010.08  

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smellyfoot â„¢ 
Asked at 2010.08.31 00:22:37
I am 26 and pregnant with my first. I have a career now, but am planning on staying home once the little one comes.

But it seems all the pregnant girls or new mothers I meet make it a point to tell me how motherhood doesn't define them, and how they want to go back to work sooo bad. That they want to "have a purpose" other than "just" being a mom. And the whole baby thing seems to be a inconvenience to their real life....

To each her own. But I'm curious to know if this is common for the women of my age group, or is it just the women I seem to be meeting?

FYI - None of my close friends are pregnant or new moms, so I'm trying to make some friends who are.
answer *ιℓσνєм  Answered at 2010.08.31 00:22:37
The idea of feminism is rooted around a woman's right to live her life the way she wants to....to be able to have whatever career she wants. However, many women over the years have turned that into almost a competition with men. "I can do the same things you do, and better, plus be a mom". And I guess that's ok for them. But the way I see it, now we as women are having to stand up for ourselves against other women, which is ridiculous. The principle of our rights is to be able to be and do what we want to do. If that's being a full time mom, then I don't know why people have a problem with that...but women get catty. Anyway, I stayed home exclusively with my son until he was 2, and then I went back to work part time. I was also 26 when he was born. I would not take ANYTHING for that time I had with him. Women say they don't want a baby to "define" them, but they let their jobs define them. And they want to "have a purpose"...what greater purpose could you have but being a mother? Some women have no choice but to work, and I understand that. I'm certainly not snotty about staying home with my son. Even about the one's that just want to work. Like you said, to each their own, but it is definately not uncool.
to be a SAHM.
FYI-most libraries have a story time for young children -ages 1+ usually. (You'll have to wait a while, of course) but I have found that it's a wonderful place to meet other SAHMs that often have the same feelings on this subject and often other similar ideals. Even before your child is old enough for that, libraries are a great place to find other moms with similar aged kids. Laying infants on a blanket beside each other is socialization, and it's nothing short of a miracle to have an adult to talk to during the day, so it would be good for both of you! Good luck with your baby. It's the best in the world! (Better-and harder) than anything you've done outside the home, guaranteed!
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